What Are You Trying to Teach Me, Lord?

In my mind, this was the week to settle back into my writing routine. I looked forward it. Planned for it. By Monday morning i was almost giddy in anticipation. 

Then, as often happens, life intervened. A sick child. Errands that demanded attention. Suddenly my day had slipped away. I did a little bit of writing, but not what I’d intended to accomplish. At first, I was frustrated, determined to recover those lost hours later in the night. To push myself harder and longer. But as I sat down with my Bible and my journal, I found a question rolling around in my mind.

What are you trying to teach me, Lord?

So many times when situations batter my well-laid plans, I sniff Satan in the air. But this time, I stopped to consider. Was this a moment for pushing through the obstacles— or for embracing them? 

It occurred to me that perhaps the Lord didn’t want me to start  fumbling around with the new story yet. Perhaps He desired me to slow down, not speed up. To enjoy a day of my son at home, albeit sick, when I hadn’t seen him for almost two weeks. Perhaps He used those situations to stay my hand, to let ideas simmer a little longer, to allow some new thought or situation to invade the story world. To trust that when He said, “Go,” that He would keep unexpected distractions at bay, as He has so often done before. 

I pondered this. Took a deep breath and set aside my lofty agenda. Not in laziness or procrastination, but with a firm belief that the Lord was asking this of me. Only time will tell, I guess, if I read the situation rightly. But given the peace that took control of my heart that day, my guess is that I did. 

Sometimes God doesn’t ask me to accomplish. Sometimes He just asks me to be.