What I Learned From My First Dinner Meeting With a Writers Group

I had a wonderful time on Wednesday night with a local Christian writers group let by my friend Lori Freeland. They meet at a restaurant and enjoy having authors and others in the publishing world come visit with them on occasion. They offer an evening of great conversation and a free dinner for their visitor. And who can beat that?

Of course I was nervous. I still feel like a bit of an impostor when a group of people looks to me for some writing wisdom, though it was easy enough to share the story of my journey to publication. But what I enjoyed most of all was interacting with the people one-on-one toward the end of the evening, answering specific questions regarding their own work or journey and encouraging them in some way. More and more I’m realizing that those interactions energize me to keep stepping out of my comfort zone and addressing groups. 

But being my first “dinner” meeting, I also learned a few things myself. Here are my top three take-aways from my time with them:

1. DON’T try to eat a salad when you are the guest who will spend much of the time talking. 

It’s harder than you think to shove a bite of lettuce and fruit and chicken in your mouth in the short moment of someone asking a question, let alone chew and swallow! Next time I would order something that could easily be cut into very tiny bites. 

1. DON’T neglect one end of the table for the other. 

Because I was seated in the middle so everyone could hear, I found I had to keep reminding myself to turn my head and talk to both ends of the table--and even to look straight ahead, on occasion, to the person sitting across from me! A little thing, but one that for me will take more practice!

1. DO make time to interact one-on-one. 

There’s nothing worse than leaving an intimate group like that feeling neglected. That tends to happen to me, so I tried very hard to talk for a few minutes with each person so everyone felt visible and valuable. I hope I succeeded a little bit in that, but want to try to do better. 

So there you have it. Three lessons learned to carry forward. I’m so blessed that Lori gave this very green author the chance to interact with a whole new group of aspiring writers. And I’m so grateful that the Lord continues to show His faithfulness in every new experience. 

Making the Most of Opportunity

When I signed my book contract, I made a few commitments to the Lord for the new journey. One of them was that I would embrace every opportunity He brought my way to promote my book. Now, if you know me well, you know this didn’t mean I’d be a marketing machine. That’s just not me. It did mean, however, that if an opportunity came my way—even if it was out of my comfort zone—I’d do it.

So a couple of weeks ago, when an independent bookseller called and asked if I’d like to participate in a book signing with a NYT bestselling romance author, I said yes, though it tied my stomach in knots. I understood from the first it wouldn’t be about selling tons of books. It would be about making new contacts and gleaning wisdom from a writer who’d walked this road longer, and apparently walked it well. And I was okay with that. At least until the day arrived. Then I found myself dreading sitting quietly to the side while people swarmed the other author. But I knew the Lord had opened this door—I’d done nothing to seek it on my own—and so I prayed He would show me very clearly why I was to be there.

I arrived to find a flurry of people, though not as many as I’d anticipated. And I learned that award-winning, bestselling author Jodi Thomas had brought one of her award-winning co-authors, Phyliss Miranda, with her. I set up my books next to Phyliss, feeling like a wallflower at a high school dance. But I needn’t have worried. Phyliss struck up a conversation right away and made me feel at home. When she and Jodi discovered that this was my debut novel, they gave me several sheets of their “autographed copy” stickers to put on the books I signed, something they do whenever they meet a debut author. 

Phyliss, Me, and Jodi

Over the course of the evening, I actually sold a few books, but that wasn’t why I was there. I was there to get to know and to learn from two gracious and humble ladies. What did I learn? That the number of books sold at an event isn’t as important as the connection with the booksellers. That some books take longer to write than others, and sometimes, even after 20 years of writing, it takes time to understand exactly what story you are trying to tell. That it is hard to do events where you have no relationship with the store or its employees. That you should network with readers and book reviewers every where you go. 

Some of these things I’d heard before, of course. But it helped to hear them again. Mostly I drank in their encouragement. I left there with three new friends--two authors and a bookseller. And I thanked the Lord that He’d given me that opportunity. The one I’d been dreading all morning. 

Phyliss, Me, Jodi, and Gayle, the bookstore owner

Lessons from Haman

I loved Beth Moore’s comment recently in the study of Esther. She remarked that when she took up the study she never imagined she’d learn as much from Haman’s life as she did from Esther’s.

I completely agree! I expected to learn (and be convicted) by Esther’s submission, by her faith, by her courage. I even anticipated lessons from Mordecai. But Haman? He’s the villain in the story! And yet don’t we all battle that sinful nature just as he did?

Haman shows us what pride and arrogance and a sense of entitlement and a thirst for personal glory lead to—humiliation and death. And they don’t look pretty in the process, either. I’ve been as convicted about what I don’t want to be as I have by the way my life falls short of what I do want it to be.

The funny thing is, I see this in fiction all the time. I can name several novels I’ve read where I’ve walked away shuddering to think that I acted in any way like this or that character—maybe even a character that I admired at the beginning of the book or even when reading it at a different stage in my life. I think God uses those people, real or fictional, to hold a mirror up to our hearts so we can see what we’ve been blind to before.

So what about you? Has a personality from Scripture or a book or even real life given you a grim look at your own heart lately? What did you see? How have you responded?