1/04/2011

Looking Ahead


I kind of tried to ignore the turn of the calendar this year. That’s really not like me. I usually revel in the newness of January, the clean slate of a new year. But the thought of 2011 really threw me for a loop.

It’s not that I’m not excited about this coming year. There are some really great things happening. But those great things have some scary edges on them, too. Want some examples?

In 2011:

  • My son—my oldest boy, my middle child—will graduate from high school. While this is a big yippee in our lives, the thought of him going off to college is bittersweet. He is the child that instinctively knows me. The one that senses when I need help and steps in. The calm one. The steady one. The one that kind of holds us all together. The thought of our home without him on a day-to-day basis is a bit scary.
  • My first novel will be published. A huge praise and an exciting time, but also a terrifying thought. Besides bracing myself for bad (or tepid) reviews and sparsely attended booksignings, I must plan a book launch party—and every party I’ve ever planned has flopped! Seeing my name on a book cover is a dream come true, but the reality is that the new road of published author is definitely a walk of faith up a steep mountain.
  • I have several trips on my calendar: a writing retreat, a research trip, the ACFW conference, and possibly another one. I’m thrilled at the thought of seeing old friends and making new ones, and the travel itself doesn’t make me as nervous as it used to, but I do worry about how being gone slices into my productivity, both in writing and in my home duties.

Those are my major things at the moment, on top of the normal tug of war between the feelings of anticipation and trepidation when considering what the days in a new year will bring.

What about you? Are there things you see coming in 2011 that incite both excitement and fear in you? Are you leaning more to one side than the other? Please share!

5 comments:

C. Alvarez said...

You don't even want to know about my prospects for the upcoming year.

As to yours, all I can say is I understand your anticipations, but quit it. Stop worrying, and give it to God.

My Godmother sent me a copy of her book with a little note card inside that said, "Good Morning! This is God! I will be handling all your problems today. I will not need your help - so have a nice day!!!"

It was a thoughtful note for me, because problems are plentiful, pain is rampant, blessings are few and joy is non-existent at the moment. But still I try to notice the small things like snowflakes that look like dandelion fluff.

In other words, I have no choice but to let God handle my load, it is far too heavy for me to bear, and if he can handle mine, he can surely handle yours.

Anne Mateer said...

I'm so sorry, C., that your prospects for the new year aren't what you want them to be. But thank you for the encouragement. You are right--the Lord is the one who will handle it all and I need to rest in that.

May I pray for you? Lord, please bless C. with great faith in Your goodness, with a respite from the pain, and with joy even when it seems there is no reason for joy. May she find her whole life, her whole self in You alone. And may You orchestrate circumstances in 2011 for her good. Amen.

C. Alvarez said...

ty, you made me cry.

Niki Turner said...

Oh Anne, me too! New Year's Eve has always been my favorite holiday. This year, not so much. And I have no idea why.
God has good things in store, that much I know, because all His promises are yes and amen to us in Christ Jesus!

Anne Mateer said...

Amen, Niki!